To a crush,

Ok, I'll say it. I regret it! And it's not what you think. I really actually like you. That is, you creep into my mind, and not just because you fit there (you pretty much don't), or because I am lonely. You sneak in and make me laugh, when I am happy, or when I least expect it. I think of you and smile now and again. Rarely, and candidly. I actually miss you when your not around.

This was not planned, and it is not pressing. You're too good for me to invite you in when I haven't secured my home yet. I have windows open; I'm airing out the place. And I'm having trouble with the lock on this one door. Well, I was, until I decided to give up on trying to lock it and just prop it open. All of the swaying and slamming from the cross-breeze was getting to me. and I'm not even entirely sure what it's there for. I've got to build a garden back there or something. Or maybe I'll just make that the front door- is the path back there paved? I can't remember. No, that can't be the front door. Stupid thing's not reliable. I'm always trying to fix it.

See? I always get preoccupied with that damn door. And even if I did lock it shut, there are the windows to consider. Like I said, you're too good for me to invite into an unsecured house. I mean, everybody should be, but you are especially.

I do like you though. And I do think about you, and wonder, sometimes.


I think about those things you said. I think about the way you look at me. I think about our first kiss.


You know what's a shame? Me talking to a door.


Sunshine